Why “Being Real” in Business Builds Better Relationships (and Better Results)
What does "be real" even mean in business? Marc Johnson gave us his take on honesty, masks and the conversations that matter.
Most business advice tells you to be authentic. Show up as yourself. Drop the mask. And then offers absolutely nothing in terms of how to do that when you're sat opposite a potential client, your team is watching how you handle a crisis, or someone at a networking event asks how business is going, and the honest answer isn't entirely comfortable.
Marc Johnson, founder of LivePay, came on What One Thing with a deceptively simple one thing: be real. What followed was one of the most practical conversations we've had about what honesty looks like in business, why it's harder than it sounds, and why it's worth doing anyway.
The Mask Most Business Owners Wear
Marc didn't always lead with honesty. Coming into a family business with something to prove, he did what most people do: performed a version of himself he thought the room needed to see. Confident, certain, across everything he did.
"You feel you've got to prove a point," he says. "And through doing that, you sometimes end up putting a bit of a mask on that's not who you really are."
The problem with a mask is that people can sense it. Not always consciously, but the feeling is there. Something is slightly off, and you can't build a real relationship with someone who's performing at you.
Hayley put it well during the conversation: when she first started networking, she wasn't fully real either. Not in a dodgy, dishonest way, just that she didn't feel people would take a chance on her if she talked about wobbles and how things were really going. Most business owners will recognise that feeling. The question is how long you let it run.
Practical takeaway: Think about the version of yourself you present professionally. Is there a gap between that and who you really are? You don't have to close it overnight, but it's good to know how big it is and to start closing it a little (more on how to do this further down).
Real Networking Happens Off Script
Marc made a point that sounds obvious the moment you hear it, but is easy to forget in practice. The best networking conversations he's ever had didn't happen at networking events. They happened at the pub beforehand, or at the bar afterwards, when everyone stopped doing their pitch face and started talking like humans.
"We get the most out of this when I can sit and have a real conversation about life with people," he says. "Not the business has got a bit dire of X or Y. That's the most boring thing on planet Earth."
What people really want to talk about, and what builds real relationships, is the stuff underneath the business update. The family, the holiday that nearly didn't happen, the challenge that's been keeping them up at night. Because those are the problems everyone else in the room has too; they just haven't said it yet.
The practical shift Marc suggests is simple: change the questions. Not "how's business?" but "what's the biggest challenge you're facing right now?" Not "how was your weekend?" but "what's the highlight of your last six months?" Different questions open different conversations, and different conversations build different relationships.
The catch, and it's an important one, is that you have to be willing to answer them yourself. You can't ask someone to be real with you while you hide behind the highlight reel.
The Kind of Boss People Don’t Leave
Marc has run an apprenticeship scheme at LivePay for over thirteen years. More than thirty apprentices have come through, and some have stayed for a decade. That kind of loyalty doesn't come from a good pension scheme. It comes from working somewhere that treats you like a person rather than a resource.
His approach is straightforward. When someone joins, he expects they'll go through difficult times, bereavements, relationship breakdowns, financial stress, all of it. Rather than leaving those things at the door, he creates space to talk about them in the way a decent human being would with someone they spend forty hours a week with.
"You being a little bit real allows them to be real," he says. "They don't feel the pressure that when you give somebody a promotion, they've got to be something that they're not."
One of his apprentices once received a council tax bill and had no idea what it was. Marc didn't sigh and send him back to his desk; he took the time and explained it. That kind of moment seems small and insignificant, but it’s what builds a team that stays.
Practical takeaway: Think about the last time someone in your team was going through something difficult. Did they feel able to tell you? If not, it might be worth examining what you could do differently to make that feel safer.
Where Does Honesty End and Oversharing Begin?
The caveat with being so real and honest is that it can slip into oversharing, and Marc is clear that nobody wants that either. The point isn't to walk into every room and announce your problems; it's to stop pretending everything is perfect when it isn't.
"Once you've let go of that, it's gone, it's not yours anymore," he says, talking about anything you say or post publicly. "Be comfortable with what you're letting go. But that doesn't mean you can't be real."
The general rule of thumb is this: share what's genuinely useful or connecting. Leave out what's purely personal and not relevant to the relationship. You can say you're having a tough time without going into every detail. You can admit a challenge without listing every consequence. The goal is a real conversation, not a confession.
Practical takeaway: Next time someone asks how things are going, try giving a slightly more honest answer than usual. Not your worst fears, just the real picture. See how the conversation shifts.
You Can't Get Help You Don't Ask For
Phil made a very valid point towards the end of the conversation. Everyone wants a mentor, a guru, that one person who's been through it and can tell you what to do next. But most people never tell that person what's really going on. They give them the surface-level version and then wonder why the advice doesn't quite land.
It's a particularly British problem. We keep the stiff upper lip, paint a picture of everything being fine, and quietly carry the thing we need help with. So, as Phil said, "They can't help you because you never tell them that you need help."
The guru isn't the problem; the gap between what you tell them and what's really happening is.
Practical takeaway: Think about someone in your corner whose advice you value. Are you giving them the real picture? If not, consider what a more honest conversation might open up.
How to Start
Marc's advice for anyone who feels like they've been performing a professional version of themselves for so long they're not sure how to stop is: don't try to overhaul it overnight.
"Just start to relax," he says. "Your true colours and true self will shine through that just by relaxing a little bit."
Let the guard down gently in one conversation. Be slightly more honest than usual with one person. Answer one question more truthfully than you normally would. That's the starting point, and the rest follows from there.
To Wrap Up
The reason this conversation kept coming back to honesty is that it underpins almost everything that makes a business work. The relationships that lead to referrals. The teams that stay. The mentors who can make a difference. The networking that leads to the good stuff.
None of it works as well as it could when you're masquerading behind a ‘professional’ front. And the good news, as Marc puts it, is that you don't have to drop the whole mask all at once. You just have to start.
What One Thing is brought to you by Corbar Accounting and Affirm IT Services Ltd.